101 Father’s Day Jokes That’ll Prove You’re as Funny as Dad (2024)

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101 Father’s Day Jokes That’ll Prove You’re as Funny as Dad (1)

ByPeter Charkalis

Updated: May 14, 2024

    Go from aww to guffaw with Father's Day jokes that prove you've got Dad's stellar sense of humor

    101 Father’s Day Jokes That’ll Prove You’re as Funny as Dad (2)

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    Father’s Day jokes that’ll make Dad proud

    Where would we be without our dads? They held our hands when we took our first steps, cheered us on when we learned to ride a bike and taught us to pick our battles, not our noses. What better way to honor your guiding light, your rock, than by making fun of him? We have a pop-pourri of Father’s Day jokes ripe for the telling. From classic dad jokes to real zingers, the wisecracks below will give you plenty of material to work with when you roast dear old Dad.

    This is the man who changed your diapers that one time. He deserves nothing but the best jokes this Father’s Day. He’ll thank you later … or not!

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    Funniest Father’s Day jokes

    • What did the rainbow say to his son after the thunderstorm?
      I’m proud of hue.
    • What kind of races do insects watch on Father’s Day?
      Gnats car.
    • What TV news show features interviews with parents?
      Meet the Stressed.
    • Where do daddy deers stop for coffee?
      Starbucks.
    • What do you call a father lion’s family?
      His pride and joy.
    • What’s a great gift for spontaneous dads?
      Off-the-cuff links.
    • What did the electrician do to his misbehaving son?
      He grounded him.
    • Why didn’t the daddy deer enter the bar?
      The sign said, “The buck stops here!”
    • What do Father’s Day customers get at the carpet store?
      Rugs and kisses.
    • What do you call a misleading commercial about Father’s Day?
      False dad-vertising.
    • What do you call a collective force of Army Rangers on Father’s Day?
      Special pops.
    • Did you hear about the kid who couldn’t stop talking about his father?
      He went on dad infinitum.
    • Did you hear about the insect who received his gift weeks after Father’s Day?
      It was bee-lated.
    • Why did the bald dad use his credit card at the wig shop?
      Toupee.

    These may be short jokes, but their humor goes a long way. Keep the laughs coming with even more Father’s Day jokes—you’ll find plenty of zingers below.

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    Funny jokes about Father’s Day

    • What did Homer Simpson find in his Father’s Day envelope?
      D’oh!
    • Why did the dad get an extra pair of golf pants for Father’s Day?
      He got a hole-in-one.
    • What do you call a company that promotes Father’s Day?
      A dad-vertising agency.
    • What do you get an ogre for Father’s Day?
      A Shrek tie.
    • What did the rabbit get for Father’s Day?
      A nose hare trimmer.
    • What kind of test is just for dads?
      A pop quiz!
    • What did the pirate say when he got another tie for Father’s Day?
      Arrre you kidding me?
    • Which mythological monster makes the best dad?
      A cy-pops!
    • How should you celebrate Dad at Father’s Day brunch?
      With a toast.
    • At what restaurant did Al Capone celebrate Father’s Day?
      Red Mobster.
    • What did it say on the vampire’s Father’s Day mug?
      World’s Best Vlad.

    Whether you’re showering him with funny compliments or doing a veritable stand-up comedy routine, your dad will no doubt appreciate your commitment to humor this Father’s Day.

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    Funny Father’s Day jokes for kids

    • What did the daddy water pistol say to the baby water pistol?
      Hey, squirt!
    • What did the buffalo say when its kid left for school?
      Bison!
    • What do you call a French father who eats too much?
      The I’m Full Tower.
    • Why did the cell phone give his daughter a timeout?
      He didn’t like her tone.
    • Did you hear about the Father’s Day brunch for the man in the moon?
      It was cratered.
    • What do you call a bunny who’s going to take over his dad’s business?
      The hare apparent.
    • What makes an egg laugh?
      Dad yolks.
    • What advice did the dad give to his baby?
      You have to choose your rattles.
    • Where do dads like to go for breakfast?
      IPOP.
    • What do you call a police vehicle that transports fathers?
      A daddy wagon.
    • What do you call a father who performs chores?
      A do-dad.
    • What do lobsters do for Father’s Day?
      They have a shell-abration.
    • How did the residents of Sesame Street learn about the Father’s Day party?
      A big birdie told them.
    • How did the dad text his kids pictures of his hat collection?
      In all caps.
    • How did Quasimodo know he was getting a tie for Father’s Day?
      He had a hunch.
    • What did the fawn call his father?
      Daddy deerest.
    • Why was the lawn ornament’s Father’s Day gift so special?
      It was gnome-made.
    • How did Pinocchio refer to Geppetto?
      As his pop-peteer.
    • What’s a dad’s favorite movie about hotshot fighter pilots?
      Pop Gun.

    There’s no stopping the chuckle fest with these jokes! When you’ve told them all, break out these other kid-friendly short jokes.

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    Father’s Day funny one-liners

    • Zoom gives children the chance to say those three special words on Father’s Day: “Dad, you’re muted!”
    • The best things in life are free, but my dad still asks for a senior citizen discount.
    • I found the perfect Father’s Day gift: a cup that says, “World’s Most Returned Mug.”
    • Father’s Day is a time of reflection. Unless you’re a vampire.
    • My dad is a great multitasker; he can garden and pretend to listen to my mother at the same time.
    • We like to leave Dad to his own devices, but he can’t remember the passwords.
    • For Father’s Day, our dad likes to sit around and do nothing. Or as they call it in Washington, “working in Congress.”
    • It was so hot on Father’s Day that Dad fanned himself with the unused gift certificates from last Father’s Day.
    • I don’t want Father’s Day gifts. All I want is to spend a nice, quiet day with someone else’s family.
    • Every Father’s Day, Dad gives Mom a big kiss and whispers in her ear, “You’re sitting in my chair.”
    • Father’s Day was foggy and windy—just like Dad.
    • I look forward to my dad’s daily butt dials.
    • Dad’s card is always 100% recycled … just like his jokes.
    • Dad isn’t one for put-downs, especially when it comes to toilet seats.
    • My dad is so old that at his first concert, instead of holding up a lighter, he rubbed two sticks together.
    • Every Father’s Day, Dad asks us the same question: “Do you want to see my sugar packet collection?”

    Everyone loves a funny one-liner, and these don’t disappoint. Get ready to knock Dad’s socks off with your wit.

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    Father’s Day knock-knock jokes

    • Knock, knock.
      Who’s there?
      GI.
      GI who?
      Gee, I forgot to get you something for Father’s Day.
    • Knock, knock.
      Who’s there?
      Franklin.
      Franklin who?
      Franklin me some money. I need to buy a Father’s Day gift.
    • Knock, knock.
      Who’s there?
      Isaiah.
      Isaiah who?
      Isaiah we do something special for Dad!
    • Knock, knock.
      Who’s there?
      Enzo.
      Enzo who?
      Enzo I tell him, “You’re the world’s greatest dad!”
    • Knock, knock.
      Who’s there?
      Vincent.
      Vincent who?
      Vincent me with a message: “Happy Father’s Day!”
    • Knock, knock.
      Who’s there?
      Hugo.
      Hugo who?
      Hugo and wish your dad a happy Father’s Day!
    • Knock, knock.
      Who’s there?
      Atlas.
      Atlas who?
      Atlas, a Father’s Day gift I actually like!
    • Knock, knock.
      Who’s there?
      Omelet.
      Omelet who?
      Omelet you make me dinner for Father’s Day.
    • Knock, knock.
      Who’s there?
      Sawyer.
      Sawyer who?
      Sawyer your dad exchange the tie you got him for Father’s Day.
    • Knock, knock.
      Who’s there?
      Justin.
      Justin who?
      Justin time! Dad’s going to talk about his cholesterol again.
    • Knock, knock.
      Who’s there?
      Maximus.
      Maximus who?
      Maximus tell you: Don’t buy Dad any more nose-hair clippers.
    • Knock, knock.
      Who’s there?
      Sofa.
      Sofa who?
      Sofa, so good. How’s your Father’s Day going?
    • Knock, knock.
      Who’s there?
      Izzy.
      Izzy who?
      Izzy here yet? I wanna see Dad open his presents!
    • Knock, knock.
      Who’s there?
      Orson.
      Orson who?
      Orson forgot to get me a Father’s Day present!
    • Knock, knock.
      Who’s there?
      Ima.
      Ima who?
      Ima be annoyed if you started Father’s Day brunch without me.
    • Knock, knock.
      Who’s there?
      Albee.
      Albee who?
      Albee amazed if Dad gets a gift he wants for Father’s Day!
    • Knock, knock.
      Who’s there?
      Saul.
      Saul who?
      Saul good. Dad loves the gift.
    • Knock, knock.
      Who’s there?
      Winnie.
      Winnie who?
      Winnie to do something special for Dad today.
    • Knock, knock.
      Who’s there?
      Wiley.
      Wiley who?
      Wiley is out of the house, we can wrap Dad’s presents.
    • Knock, knock.
      Who’s there?
      Windsor.
      Windsor who?
      Windsor dad get here? I bought him a gift!

    Got a favorite knock-knock joke of the bunch? Arrive prepared at your dad’s celebration and tell one (or more) of these Father’s Day jokes when you knock on the door.

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    Father’s Day dad jokes

    • Why did the dad keep making bad jokes during the TV show?
      He was cringe-watching.
    • What did Mona Lisa say to the police when arrested?
      “I was framed!”
    • When do carpenters play pranks?
      On April Tools Day!
    • How do owls save money?
      They shop with who-pons.
    • What do you call a ghost mystery?
      A boo-dunit!
    • What’s a monster’s favorite newspaper column?
      The horror-scopes.
    • What do you get when you cross a famous physicist with a dad?
      Pop-penheimer.
    • What creepy TV family likes to make bad jokes?
      The Punsters!
    • Did you hear about the owl who joined the military?
      He reported to hoot camp.
    • Where can a rabbit catch a flight?
      The hare port.
    • How do young dogs drink without spilling?
      They use a sippy pup.
    • Where can insects borrow books?
      From the fly-brary!
    • Where are feathered criminals sent?
      To the hen-iteniary.
    • What did the clown give his Valentine?
      A dozen red noses.
    • What radio station do pirates listen to?
      NP-Arrr.
    • When is the best time to ask a horse a question?
      During a Q and hay.
    • What’s a snake’s favorite dessert?
      Apple pie-thon.
    • Who does a sailor visit when he has vision problems?
      An aye, aye doctor!
    • When can a turtle talk about his favorite toy?
      During slow-and-tell.
    • Which city in Nevada has the cleanest teeth?
      Floss Vegas.
    • How do hens wake up so early in the morning?
      They set an alarm cluck.

    Nobody does corny humor quite like a dad, though you can try! Make like your old man and get everyone laughing (or groaning) this Father’s Day with the dad jokes above.

    Why trust us

    Reader’s Digest has been telling jokes for more than 100 years, curated and reviewed over the past 20 years by Senior Features Editor Andy Simmons, a humor editor formerly ofNational Lampoonand the author ofNow That’s Funny.We’ve earned prestigious ASME awards for our humor—including comical quips, pranks, puns, cartoons, one-liners, knock-knock jokes, riddles, memes, tweets and stories in laugh-out-loud magazine columns such as “Life in These United States,” “All in a Day’s Work,” “Laughter, the Best Medicine” and “Humor in Uniform,” as well as online collections such asshort jokes,dad jokesandbad jokesso bad, they’re great. You can find a century of humor in our 2022 compendium,Reader’s Digest: Laughter, the Best Medicine. For this story on the funniest Father’s Day jokes, Peter Charkalis tapped his experience as a comedy writer for late-night TV shows including The Arsenio Hall Show,The Late Late Show with Craig FergusonandThe Late Late Show with Craig Kilborn. Read more about ourteam, our contributors and oureditorial policies.

    Originally Published: May 14, 2024

    Author

    Peter Charkalis

    Peter has been a professional comedy writer for more than two decades, working as a staff writer for The Late Late Show hosted by Craig Kilborn and Craig Ferguson, and The Arsenio Hall Show. He currently hosts a podcast about being the only comedian in Los Angeles who doesn’t have a podcast.

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